“Weird Al” Yankovic – In 3-D (1984)


Less than a year later, Mr. Yankovic dished out to the masses his second collection of oddball tunes and split-yer-sides song parodies! Guess what? It’s more of the same! Guess what else? There’s a lot of growth here to be appreciated!

In 3-D displays two very major departures from Al’s debut: the frameworks of the parodies are more faithful to their original versions, and the accordion has been cut back substantially. These new permanent changes are what, quite literally, separates the debut from the rest of the catalog in spirit. This was obviously a wise decision, since the faithfulness of the parody numbers would widen the appeal to those who would otherwise not give much of a shit about song parodies since a) a more faithful parody actually sounds more impressive, and b) a more faithful parody is, as it turns out, funnier than a less faithful parody. I don’t think I’ll have to go into detail of the wisdom of cutting back on the accordion. Needless to say, In 3-D helped elevate Al into the upper echelon of music parody kings! Obviously, barely anyone else was, or is, in that echelon anyway, BUT it was proven that Weird Al was all everybody really needed to fill this role in their lives that nobody asked for. The rest is history.

Al’s second effort consists of 11 tracks: 5 parodies, 5 originals, and 1 polka medley! Here’s another major change: every album from here on out (except for Even Worse) will contain a polka medley somewhere in the tracklist. These medleys are usually comprised of contemporary hit songs, mostly anything the average Joe has been hearing on their local radio stations in the last year or so, reinterpreted as full-fledged balls-to-the-wall over-the-top happy-go-lucky polka music! We’re talking an onslaught of frantic accordion, bouncy tuba, annoying clarinet, and flamboyant percussion! The polka-medley du jour on In 3-D is called “Polkas on 45” which is, apparently, a play on something called “Stars on 45”, a Dutch novelty group from the ’80s that mashed up popular songs over a generic drum beat. That sounds like the pits! On paper, so do these polka medleys, but really they are actually quite jolly good fun! For example, “Polkas on 45” contains lyrical snippets from Deep Purple’s “Smoke on the Water”, The Doors’ “L.A. Woman”, The Police’s “Every Breath You Take”, The Clash’s “Should I Stay or Should I Go?”, among many others. SO, over polka music, Al sings in his nasally Weird Al voice “Every breath you take/Every move you make/Every bond you break, every step you take/I’ll be watching you” and then moves right into “Darling you gotta let me know/Should I stay or should I go?…“. GET THE PICTURE?! We always have a good time in Weird Al’s house.

The five parody songs are as follows: “Eat It” (“Beat It” by Michael Jackson), “The Brady Bunch” (“The Safety Dance” by Men Without Hats), “I Lost on Jeopardy” (“Jeopardy” by The Greg Kihn Band), “King of Suede” (“King of Pain” by The Police), and “Theme from Rocky XIII” (“Eye of the Tiger” by Survivor). Of these five the only one with zero lasting power was “Jeopardy”, so kudos once again to Al for choosing his parody targets somewhat wisely. “Eat It” and “Theme from Rocky XIII” are both about food, helping ensnare his morbidly obese target demographic nicely! Al even cracked the Top 40 with “Eat It”, which largely clinched his status as a household name from this album forward. The only miss here is “The Brady Bunch”, which, halfway through, becomes just the lyrics of The Brady Bunch theme! Come on Al, now’s not the time in your career to make lazy songwriting decisions! It’s kind of funny hearing these early Weird Al parodies lacking the more impressive lyrical mastery from later-career parodies, not to mention that they’re all only kind of funny. He really does get better at this as time goes on.

Now the originals, this is where the real meat is at! Sort of! You’ll be able to tell that I like the originals better than the parodies by how much more I’ll talk about them! “Midnight Star” is all about a shitty Weekly World News-type tabloid newspaper and the song sounds like Born to Run-era Bruce Springsteen. “Mr. Popeil” is all about inventor Ron Popeil’s infomercials and the song sounds like the B-52s. “Nature Trail to Hell” is all about an advertisement for a new cheesy slasher film hitting the theaters and the song sounds kinda like elements of Black Sabbath, and uh, I don’t know, Nick Cave maybe, with some operatic female backing vocals thrown in for good measure. These three songs are phenomenal, showcasing Al’s ability to cobble together some loose influences and craft a supremely catchy tune without straying too far into rip-off territory. “Nature Trail to Hell”, the closer, is an especially standout track, considering it doesn’t sound like much like any real song I can think of. It starts out with a cool, eerie, atmospheric tapestry of spoooOoOoOoOooooky hell noises, leading to an organ-laden musical intro and some of Al’s take on Vincent Price-styled vocals in the opening verse. In the middle is the keenest, neatest little clarinet solo you ever did done hear on, like, any album ever! It’s so sinister and jaunty that you can just picture a fat little fucking imp cavorting around playing his little Hell-fife.

Not all the originals are that good, though. “That Boy Could Dance” is an extremely forgettable old-school Americana rock song, bringing to mind the Doobie Brothers or the Eagles or some other generic roots rock dinosaurs of yore. “Buy Me a Condo” is even more dreadful, displaying a mocking pastiche of Bob Marley-era reggae that borders on racist with lyrics like “Gonna buy me a condo/Never have to mow me lawn/I get a funny little t-shirt/Wit’ de alligator on“. Yuck. Although picturing Bob Marley selling Amway products while wearing LaCoste polo shirts is pretty amusing. He’s fucking dead though, you asshole, so stop laughing.

What? Oh yeah. Anyway, In 3-D is a significant improvement over his self-titled debut and this level of quality will remain consistent, more or less, as he keeps pumping out albums. This particular record is the blueprint for the rest of Al’s career, so even if you’re a snooty, snobby fan of only lo-fi ’90s Estonian depressive black metal EPs this is still the best album to listen to in order to sharpen your historical knowledge of the quintessential pop-savvy parody expert. No self-respecting nerd in 2020 is allowed to pretend he/she/xe is too cool for Weird Al anymore.

GOOD


Hey, I wrote other posts like this! Check out this shit too please:


Leave a Reply

Your email address will not be published. Required fields are marked *