Welcome to Buffyness and Nightlurkers Presents: Fray, Issue #1 – “Chapter One: Big City Girl”!

I’ve been wanting to dig into the Buffyverse comics for a long time, even before I started reading comic books. When I learned that subsequent seasons of Buffy would appear in comic book form, I was extremely skeptical. Fuck comic books, I thought! Children’s entertainment! Lowbrow! Then I realized that it was going to be the only way to get more Buffy, so the idea of reading these comic books became slightly more appealing as time went on. Then, when I started my whole comic book extravaganza adventure, I wanted to hit the Buffy stuff as soon as possible. It saddens me that it took this long.

I’m reading the entire Buffyverse in order, which means all the Angel stuff and Spike stuff and side stories and one shots. This means starting with Fray, a limited series written by Joss Whedon that was meant to be a futuristic spin-off of Buffy. I know nothing about it, but it kicks everything off proper and I look forward to seeing what Whedon cooks up here.

Onward. I’ve got a long journey ahead of me.

Fray, Issue #1 [June, 2001]
Written by: Joss Whedon
“Chapter One: Big City Girl”

You can tell it’s the future because a young woman is crouched on the corner of the roof of a tall building pointing laser gun of sorts at some baddie climbing up the side. There are also cars flying around. Welcome to the future. The future looks bleak.

“Bad day,” the young woman thinks. “Started bad, stayed that way.”

A demon leaps fancifully around a graveyard. An off-panel conversation is underway.

“She is discovered.”

“We’re certain it’s she?”

“We are.”

The Watchers have found her. There hasn’t been been one in 200 years, but there is one now! Stop arguing.

The demon heads toward a large stone shaped like an angry bald dude with an open mouth. The open mouth leads to large stone staircase. The demon descends.

“They mean to approach her. To begin the cycle anew.”

“That must not be.”

Oh, it be all right. It very be. The demon enters a gigantic chamber with a large pit in the center full of skeletons and desiccated corpses.

“You overstep your bounds. She must be intercepted.”

“We have summoned Urkonn. He will deal with her.”

The demon finds a trapdoor in the ground, opens it up, and descends further.

“He’ll not fail. She’s but a mortal.”

“What is she called?”
“Fray. Melaka Fray.”

lol, “Melaka”. Pretty much the Greek insult. Good choice of first name there, Joss. And yes, I’m talking about your own first name, Joss.

Hey, my existence isn’t pointless! For example, I’m reading Fray by Joss Whedon! …ok, point taken.

The demon approaches an even bigger demon! He gives the little demon the ol’ side-eye. And that’s the end of the intro!

“cue Friends opening credits music*

Melaka Fray looking cyberpunky, flying around town shooting lasers. She expounds upon the earlier mentioned bad day. Fingernail in the breakfast. Some dude named Gunther giving her a job in the Uppers. Some dude named Ruebrin and his cohorts knocking Fray off the roof. “…well, actually, that was kinda fun.”

She lands with a WHUMP on a flying Oldsmobile-looking thing. If this were real life (AND WHO’S TO SAY THAT IT ISN’T??), she just broke her back. “The trick is to use every obstacle you can. Turn one big drop into lots of little ones.” She descends on a lot of little drops: lands on another car, grabs onto an antenna, braces herself for a less-than-ideal impact on the street. SMASH. Right on the face. If this were real life (AND WHO’S TO SAY THAT IT ISN’T??), she just broke all her teeth.

“See? You killed her,” says a guy who is not named Jesu. The other guy, Jesu, he grabs Fray from the street and holds her in a headlock. “Just give up the grab, don’t make a scene.”

Fray kicks him in the knees, then (presumably) scratches his eyes, then a foot right in the crotch. Right in the danglers. That’s going to leave a mark. The other guy, the guy who isn’t Jesu, he has his fancy future gun aimed at her head. She aims her own at his head. “Well,” he says. “It appears we have a stand-off.”

KCHZZZZZZZZ!! Blasted right in his face. Oh baby.

“I don’t have a stand-off…” she says while this guy thinks he just died. “Tell Ruebrin to keep his claws off of Gunther’s grab… Gunter works the west side. Ruebrin starts pushing, there’s gonna be a war. Ready for a war?”

The guy’s holding his hands to his eyes going “bluuuhb” and “hrrrnnn” while Fray gives him the business. “Haddyn’s a big district. Everybody keeps to themselves, everybody gets happy.”

She hitches a ride on the bottom of a hover bus and flies her way to her next destination.

The standard courteous greeting in the future. Learn it or else you might offend somebody.

Fray is meeting Gunther in his office. “I don’t much like waiting, but there’s one thing you can count on with Gunther… He likes to make an entrance.”

The lights click on in his office, revealing a glass floor over a large pool. The pool contains a scary merman creature! “Melahhhka… at lasst you’re here.”

Gunther is a Radie, which is like a mermaid only Radier! As in, mutated by radiation. Gunther’s not that creepy, Fray claims, but he looks pretty danged creepy to me. It doesn’t help that all the office furniture is above the glass. Unsettling! Not really, but I’m painting a picture for you here, goddamnit!

“Besides, creepy or not, Gunther’s the boss.”

Fray has returned with the grab: a necklace with an emerald pendent. “You didn’t tell me Ruebrin was after this thing. Put my on a pretty ice patch.” She dangles the thing above him so that he can see through the glass. She looks ready to give him one of those Thai shit shows, if you catch my drift (hopefully you don’t). Fray demands some hazard pay, but Gunther thinks that kind of request is beneath her. Speaking of beneath her…

Anyway, she’s not coughing up the goods for less than “seventy coi”. She then ruminates over whether or not she should attempt to push it with Gunther. She’s about ready to give up and take what she can get when Gunther says he’ll give her “three sil” for it. This must be a lot. She tries not to hyperventilate. She plays it cool. “Well, all right… but I’m not letting you off that cheap next time. It’s just ‘cause I like you.”

Yeah, it seems pretty SIL-ly if you ask me! Wubba lubba dub dub!

She leaves. He verbalizes his wish for her to show up in a skirt some day. Joss kills it with the sexual harrassment! As usual.

“Gunther’s not sentimental. I may be his best runner but I’m just a runner, so why the big bonus?” Is it a contract to bind her for the unforseeable future? Or is it some sort of severence package? Or maybe he’s just got a lot of money burning a hole in his merman pockets! He seems like a nice guy. Very… squishy…

Fray walks through the dark alleys and senses something behind her: a few ratty-looking zombie creatures. “Lurks. I don’t like Lurks.” These Lurks look like nice guys! Very… drooly… One of them is a lady Lurk, she looks like she’d be hot if she weren’t such a Lurk. I like saying “Lurk”. Lurk.

She’s about to get Lurked, but the police arrive to fuck with her shit. “Melaka Fray, stand down and offer submission,” the woman in the flying cop car says before it lands and she emerges. Tight red leather suit, trench coat. “Hello Officer, what can I do for you?” Fray says sweetly. Like a sugar-coated fist to the throat.

The cop asks what she’s doing out here. She inquires about Gunther, which causes Fray to get defensive about her association with the Radie. That’s not why the cop is here though, heh heh? Did she scare ya? BOO! Ha! No, she’s here because of a nearby robbery. “Ancient amulet, taken from the wall safe of a senator.” It’s priceless! And ancient! “Someone who looks exactly like you was seen fleeing – or, um, falling – from the scene.”

Guess what, toots? She ain’t know nothin’ ‘bout no amulet. All she’s being doing tonight is playing Bingo with the old folks and kickin’ the can with Mugsy and the Boys. No acquiring of the amulet, no selling to Gunther, no three sil, no shoes, no shirt, no service.

These two have a history. The cop comments on Fray’s excessive body ornamentation, and Fray thinks she’s looking for a bribe. “I didn’t think you dealt in solid anymore, strictly credits in the Uppers, isn’t that right?” She comments on this cop’s whiz-bang sergeant promotion and how she can now afford whatever she wants, which causes the cop to look down sheepishly. “For God’s sake, Mel, stop it,” she says quietly.

The cop is named Erin. She’s not here to ruffle Fray’s feathers. She doesn’t even have feathers, dogg. She just wants to help keep Fray out of trouble. Fray doesn’t want her help.

These two have a history, all right! Sisters! How’s that for some family drama?

Melaka stole Erin’s Tamagotchi and there’s been a grudge for the last 15 years over it. Who can blame her?

Erin makes a quip that Melaka isn’t good at taking care of anyone, last she checked. There’s a quick flashback of Melaka running with a man away from someone. Or something. “You bitch,” she says. So this guy died? He looks like Clark Kent. That guy can’t die, he has too much yellow sun coursing through his veins! Something like that, right?

Melaka storms off.

Next scene! Versi is a terrible slum, the biggest warren in Haddyn. A milky-eyed girl with half an arm missing is happy to see Melaka show up. “Versi is the kind of place the kids in the Uppers have never even read about. It isn’t safe, and it isn’t clean. It’s home.”

The girl rambles on and on about nothing, as young girls do, but within the blah-blah-blah there’s mention of a bald man who was looking for Fray. He said she was “Chosen”. Like a vampire Slayer! I wonder where Joss got that idea? Probably stole it from the guy who created Buffy. What a tool!

The bald man is still there, politely trying to get Fray’s attention. He looks like he’s wearing a black clergy oufit, but it’s dripping with what I hope is just water. “You… are the Chosen… I am not worthy to come before you… you will save us…” Great, it’s some creep. Looking to get your jollies, creep? Step off, creep.

That’s plenty of looking like I committed an awful crime for one day.

Fray is more bewildered than anything else. “You will protect us,” the man continues. “End the scourge…” He pulls out a lit match; the girl comments that the man smells like gas. “You will cleanse us all…” he goes full-on… that monk who set himself on fire… and sets himself on fire!

“Guy lights himself on fire,” Fray thinks. “What’s that all about?”

Looking out for Versi more than anything, since she isn’t to keen on this dumbass possibly burning down the whole warren, Fray decides to tackle the guy over the edge of a pier and into the stinkin’ river. Satisfied with the whole dousing-the-self-immolating-guy thing, she hoists herself out of the river and returns to her own quarters. “I’m not gonna let it get to me. I’ll take a bath, crawl into bed… forget about everything.”

“’Cause, hey. It may have been a pretty bad day…”

“…but at least it’s over.”

Pan to why it’s not over. Fray enters her apartment and clicks on her light. Behind her is an enormous, horned demon. Just squatting in her apartment waiting. Looking all like the kind of demon you’d see on Buffy. Looking like all kinds of cheap makeup.

Final Thoughts

This is pretty good already. Some real anti-hero shit. I’m already looking forward to the long, long journey ahead.

I don’t have much else to say. Time to get some Doritos!