December 14, 1995 – Broome County Arena, Binghamton, NY

Set One

Suzy Greenberg — 7:22
High-energy “Suzy Greenberg” right out the gate. Love the drum shuffle lead-in to a fantastic Page solo at around 3:45. It makes me want to get up and dance! If only I knew how to dance or get up.

This show was officially released as Live Phish 01, so I suppose this is an iconic show for the following reasons: 1) uhh, 2) uhm. I guess I’ll find out.

Llama — 5:52
Holy snakes, friends. They don’t make “Llama”s like this anymore! I can already tell that this is going to be Page’s show; he’s slamming his dick all over the keys with furious self-righteousness! Deservedly so!

I like seeing llamas at the zoo, although they’re always taunting me with their long-ass, fuzzy necks. It’s going to be the llama’s downfall someday, you can take that one to the bank.

Horn — 3:29
“Horn” is such a throwaway song that I won’t dignify it with any further commentary! BEEP BEEP!

Foam — 10:53
“Foam” starts out so knotty that I almost thought it was sloppy, but I eventually understood the METHOD to their MADNESS and heard the glorious resolution. Angular and cerebral, it requires you to hack through its thorny thickets to get that sweet, sweet dopamine hit. Watch out or you’ll FALLLL INTO A DEEP WELL.

Page strikes again! From 3:00 to 5:45 he goes incredibly jazzy with it. Mike grooves alongside, and Trey takes a backseat to let it all unfold with out his guitar ninny-ness. Fish plays the drums!

Makisupa Policeman — 6:43
Trey smoked a joint with Gaddafi according to this version of “Makisupa Policeman”. Trey wouldn’t do that anymore. These days he would probably read the bible to him. It’s a good thing Gaddafi already killed himself!

I tried to look up “makisupa” and all I got were Phish-related results. I don’t condone this making up of words from my favorite stoned band. I would’ve preferred a name like “Honorable Policeman”. Back the blue, yo. *gag*

Split Open and Melt — 14:41
This “Split Open and Melt” settles into a nice, albeit repetitive, groove that builds into a frenzied Page-led jam. He really smacks those keys in a, well, a frenzy! A very frenzied “Split Open and Melt”! Never have I heard such a frenzy!

Tela — 6:30
I don’t know much about “Tela”, but I imagine they’re all the same. Just Page singing like he thinks he knows how to sing, subject matter all sorts of mountains and thawing frozen hearts. Mushy stuff! What is this, Phish 3.0? Not on my watch!

Taste That Surrounds — 8:00
Wow, this one is cool. Trey sings the usual “Taste” lyrics while Fish (I think?) sings some other shit over it. At about 3:15 you get the usual “Taste” jam, nothing overly special, but enjoyable nonetheless. A nice TASTE of music, if you ask me!

Don’t ever ask me anything. I’m dumb.

My Sweet One — 2:23
Bluegrass a cappella, of course. Usually! This one features Fish rat-tat-tatting and another frenetic Page solo.  A good transition from the jammy “Taste That Surrounds” to the hard-hitting “Frankenstein”.

Once you’ve heard one of these you’ve heard them all, so here’s a story about my first ever Phish concert: I’ve never been to one! I wouldn’t be caught dead at a fucking Phish concert, are you serious? How dare you.

Frankenstein — 5:02
Edgar Winter has luscious hair.

Set Two

The Curtain — 7:18
After a brief audience chess movie, the band begins its second set with a rousing version of “The Curtain”. More than a lot of songs, “The Curtain” always felt like a ’70s art rock song. Like something from the Moody Blues or Procol Harum or some other band no one cares at all about in 2024.

As you can see, the band eschewed the “With” part of “The Curtain”. No extended solo here! In fact, it seamlessly segues into a…

Tweezer — 9:16
…decent chunk of “Tweezer”, which will total 19 minutes if you don’t count the “Timber” interlude. The tweezy jam kicks off at 4:10, laid back and relaxed like me when I get my dick sucked by a Phish song.

Tweezer is probably the most overplayed jam vehicle in their canon, right? Like, how many different ways can you really play this shit? This one is one of those equal opportunity jams. Everyone gets a piece!

Timber (Jerry) — 4:57
Another seamless transition into one of Phish’s more hypnotic covers. The solo section rocks and rolls with some tasty Trey/Page interplay. Mike probably plays bass, I really cannot tell. Who’s that drumming? The Fish Man?

I clearly have nothing to say about this one! But it builds heartily into a noisy frenzy (there’s that word again!) right as it transitions back into the second half of Tweezer.

Tweezer — 9:47
MORE TWEEZER? WHAT THE FUCK, MAN? WHAT DID I DO TO DESERVE THIS?

Keyboard Army — 3:48
People are really cheering and yucking it up during “Keyboard Army”, which is just Page playing the same five-note lick for four minutes.

FUN FACT: This is the last “Keyboard Army” for 20 years! It gets busted out during the September 6th, 2015 show at Dick’s Sporting Goods Park in Commerce City, Colorado. It only gets played because the first letter of every song in the encore spells out “THANK YOU” and I guess they didn’t want to play another “Kill Devil Falls”? MISSED OPPORTUNITY.

Halley’s Comet — 11:53
I have a soft spot for “Halley’s Comet” because I was born one year after the last instance of Halley’s Comet and now I have to wait until 2061 before I’ll have a chance to see it. By then I’ll have cataracts! Thanks, cruel fate.

At least I got to see Hale-Bopp in 1997! Anyway, the tempo of this particular version gets amped up like crazy at 7:30 and doesn’t really let go until it settles into a sweet, hazy, chuggy, groovy groove for the last couple minutes. Yeah baby, 2061 ain’t got nothing on this!

NICU — 9:10
“NICU” is such a great song. I think Page’s synthesized organ makes it. It has this oompah oompah thing going for it. Plus, the “NICU” pun is exquisite, although I sometimes I think they could make better use of it. Like “Your baby’s sick/And almost dead/It’s such a shame/Stuck in its bed/If you see me/NICU/Say hi to me while I mess with your head”. I don’t know! Something like that!

I’ll workshop it a little more later.

Slave to the Traffic Light — 11:25
A late Set Two staple, but this one kind of sucks the momentum out of the room. It reminds me of a party every time I come through the door! But seriously folks, this is supposed to come across as psychedelic but I think it’s kind of a snooze! Like me talking to a lady at a party, except I’m not the one snoozing.

I’m sorry for writing all of that.

Encore

Bold as Love — 6:16
Does Page think he’s Jimi Hendrix? Page is NOT Jimi Hendrix? Or is he? Could he be a reincarnation? Wait a minute, let’s do the math here!

Jimi Hendrix died in 1970.
Page McConnell was born in 1963.

Fuck.