I chose this show on a complete whim. Hot off the heels of American Horror Story, Season 1, I wanted to sink my ugly, putrid teeth into another meaty story of American horror! And instead of traipsing over to Season 2, I settled on Black Summer.

I was scanning through Netflix’s horror TV list. I picked this one because I liked the name. I had no idea what it was about, I didn’t know what to expect, and I obviously didn’t even know that it was a spinoff of Z Nation. Perhaps I’ll watch that one soon as well. I like DJ Qualls! I weigh more than him!

Turn up the brightness on your computer and/or laptop and/or cellular smartphone. You can barely even see this dumb screenshot!

The Premise

This is gonna be a very easy and short premise! There’s a zombie apocalypse going on, it’s only about six weeks old, and shit got really fucked up in the country.

The zombies are tough, ruthless, and fast. Dying in any fashion will zombify you within about five seconds, causing you to relentlessly chase down alive people, gnaw on them for a bit, and sate your hunger. Your endurance will skyrocket. It takes about four shotgun bullets to kill you. You’re snarly and mean. You probably pooped your pants too when you died and that might contribute to the irrational anger.

People meet up with one another and form wary friendships and bonds. Each has their own goal, whether it be finding loved ones or finding stable refuge, and the ones that stay alive through the course of the season will do what they need to do to keep pushing forward. And if that means killing bitches and being mean to other bitches, then so be it!

We’re just a group of friendly fun people looking to have some friendly fun! :-]

My Half-Baked Thoughts

I guess this was my very first zombie-related anything I’ve ever watched! I’ve been wanting to watch The Walking Dead, I suppose, but I’ve never felt the MANLY URGE to zombie up my current routine. This was a decent start to whatever “zombie journey” task I’m pretty much inventing right now!

The beginning of the show appeared to be more of a suspenseful character study than an actual plot-driven narrative, which I was completely sold on right away. The first couple of episodes show a few of the main characters, at least the beginning main characters, as they attempt to escape their suburban town once the ZOMBIE PANDEMIC wrests hold of it.

Nice to meet you. My name is Velez and I promise I’m not going to kill you. Unless you piss me off, of course. Then I can barely make any promises.

You got Rose, the pretty blonde mother whose daughter was taken away for refuge without her.

You got Ryan, the deaf guy who ends up eventually fucking himself over by being deaf.

You got Spears, who isn’t really named “Spears” but he killed a Army soldier named Spears and stole his Army uniform (with Spears written on it so that you know he stole Spears’ identity from Spears).

You got Barbara, a middle-aged woman looking for her husband until she gets launched through a motherfucking car windshield.

You got Lance, a husky stoner guy who stays alive only because he lucks out every single time.

You got Velez, a cool guy who is nice and trying to gain trust and help out.

You got Sun, an ass-kicking Korean woman who barely speaks English.

That’s all I have to say about that.

In this scene, Spears has his gun aimed at a group of children! Why, you ask? They stole his Junior Mints.

With only eight 30-ish minute episodes, I was motivated and able to burn through the whole series in a weekend. I enjoyed the first half way more than the second half, and anyone who isn’t a complete dullard would agree with me. Yeah, I’m talking about you, you dullard. The first half is more suspenseful, especially if you didn’t know entirely what to expect from these quick-as-diarrhea zombies, but mostly because, like the characters, you have no idea who to actually trust early on. Would the 90-pound Korean woman crush your head like a flabby little grape?? Would the guy who killed the soldier and stole his stuff go on to kill someone else and steal their stuff?? Would Barbara rise up as a zombie after blunt force trauma to the head and start running around trying to rip out the nearest available jugular vein?? You don’t know! You just don’t know!

There are a few fantastically tense moments early on. Velez, Sun, and Barbara spend an episode in the car slowly gaining trust and getting to know one another while occasionally being attacked and/or being followed and/or having to pull out a bike frame lodged in their wheel well. Velez and Sun are stuck in a diner with another unknown group while zombies circle the building, and they need to work on figuring out what to do and who to throw out the door as bait. HINT: It’s the guy who sucks! My favorite scene in the season is Lance at the fully stocked grocery store. He goes about a shopping routine, completely alone, push-basket and everything, like it’s just another normal day. A moment’s respite from the total insanity.

Don’t forget to pick me up some Ben & Jerry’s, Lance. You always forget the Ben & Jerry’s.

The season starts to unravel after the Diner episode. The whole group becomes experts in shooting bullets with guns and they decide to pull a heist for Zombie Jesus knows why. I don’t even remember what they were doing! Were they attempting to steal a stockpile of guns so they can shoot more gun bullets? Why was there a creepy dance party going on? Where are my pants and why do I feel drugged?

At the end of the season they make their way to their destination, “The Stadium”, where Rose catches up with her daughter immediately. As in, she’s the very first person to step out of the concourse. I thought that was kind of dumb!

GOOD GUY WITH A GUN AT YOUR SERVICE.

There, that’s enough half-baked thoughts about this. This post, just like the season, had a lot more effort in the first half than the second half!

Worth the Watch?

Sure. It’s fine. Even with almost every bit of my free time dedicated to writing, I was able to polish off this season in three days. You, the lucky individual so much endless free time that you’re actually bored enough right now to read my blog, could finish this in an afternoon.

I will watch Season 2, and I’ve heard good enough things about Z Nation that I’ll likely give that a shot as well.

Seacrest out.