The Woman of Tanchico is a cozy little inn. Not very many patrons, but there is fuckin’ clown dancing around the table playing a harp. Mat recognizes him as the Wheel of Time’s favorite unregistered sex offender Thom Merrilin the Glee-iest Gleeman this side of Gleemantown. Thom notices him, so Mat sits down at a table and orders two mugs wine expecting Thom to join him after he’s done harping.

Thom is drunk already and the serving girls give Mat some icy stares about ordering wine for him. Mat’s like “I DIDN’T KNOW, I DIDN’T KNOOOOOWWW!!” Thom is more of a sad-sack than Mat has ever remembered. A real sorry state of affairs. Thom blithers to the serving girls that he’s loved two women in his life: Morgase (queen) and Dena (dead), and he missed out on both. One he screwed up by making her want to kill him, and the other he accidentally got killed! Such is life, I suppose.

Mat orders a few full chickens for the two of them. Thom stares into space while Mat eats all of it himself. Then they talk: Mat thought Thom was on his way to Tear, and Thom’s like “I ‘unno”. Then Thom asks if Rand is ok, and Mat’s like “he’s alive last I checked”. Then Mat asks why Thom is in Tar Valon full of meddling, conniving Aes Sedai, and Thom deflects and mutters about Carhien instead. And the only place worse to be than Tar Valon right now is Caemlyn. Mat’s getting tired of Thom’s sad-sackery and tells him his intention to go to Caemlyn and that Thom should go with him if he’s in the mood to get himself killed or something. Thom perks up, thinks this is a dandy idea, and grabs his things.

One of the serving girls thanks Mat for perking him up, gives him a silver coin and tells him his eyes are pretty! Mat pops his trademark boner and Thom and Mat head out. Mat notices the corpse is missing from the street now. Puzzled, they make their way to the docks to take the first boat out of town.